Posted by Sharon Odmann on July 07, 1998 at 19:59:14:
In Reply to: Thanks for the Advice (Creme Brulee) posted by Celeste on July 06, 1998 at 21:48:07:
: Thanks to everyone who wrote back with the information I requested on the creme brulee bet. I'd also like to thank you for the open advice on dealing with the gentlemen that I work with, but I feel like you still don't quite know what it feels like to be brushed aside like I have been in this job. I really like working with them, but I'm not going to let them lecture me like I'm some idiot while I sit there and smile and take it one step at a time. I know that they all really appreciate the work that I do, but I feel as if they value me only because I'm early everyday (sometimes saving their butts) and I do my job well. Maybe I'll get the nerve up to talk to my chef.....who knows, maybe I'm imagining the whole thing. I'ts not that I think it's even chauvenistic or anything. I just want to be treated as an equal. I've never asked them to do anything for me because I couldn't do it myself. After all they curse like sailors, as do I, and tell me dirty jokes...I just thought that being treated as an equal wouldn't be such a stretch.
Celeste,
I am a woman chef, a *real* career changer, and believe me we all know what it is like to be brushed aside in a job due to some preconceived notion or other.
I am 47 now and graduated from culinary school in '96. Your complaint about men vs women is a fact of life, and it is not only evident in the food service industry. Tis a real shame, but dearie, it is just the way it is in the world. You may want it to be different (as we all do, I'm sure) but it isn't.
When I was doing my internship in the banquet department of a hotel, the chef, a man, was a crack addict and abused us, stole our money, stole from the hotel. I did everything, including setting up the nightly bar buffet that had over 100 items on it. I made all the soups, did the ordering, generally covered chef's butt while he ran wild. I was actually called into the food service manager's office (himself a "master chef" with a certificate from South Africa) and told that I was an uppity woman and would never amount to anything. Fer cryin' out loud, I was doing all the work and much better than the chef. After I left there, I went back of the house in 3 other restaurants, and the situation was pretty much the same in each; jerks in charge, lots of drugs, disrespect for the women, abusive language (which is not the telling of dirty jokes), people who didn't want to care about doing their jobs.
That is why I am a caterer now, working for myself. Unless it is absolutely a life emergency, I would never work in back of the house again. I have lots of respect for anyone who can put up with that sort of atmosphere.
So my advice to you is this: get used to it, live with it, do the best you can for yourself, learn as much as you can and work until you get to the level where you call the shots, then you can make a difference in someone else's career because you will know how Not to act.
Cheers,
Sharon